“A year from now you may wish you had started today.” - Karen Lamb
Infidelity Therapy
Is Your Marriage Or Relationship In Crisis Following An Affair?
Infidelity introduces a rollercoaster of emotions for both partners. Trust has been broken, tears have been shed, and life as you knew it has suddenly turned upside down. It’s understandable that you’re grieving.
Feelings of shame, guilt, and embarrassment make it difficult to be honest with each other and others. And as anger and isolation take over, questions about the future and how this happened may have completely altered the course of your relationship.
It probably seems like no matter how you approach the subject, the conversation quickly escalates and shifts to pointing fingers. Home has become a tense atmosphere, and there’s no referee around to tell you what’s unwarranted or below the belt.
You may feel like you’re talking in circles, never able to fully arrive at the answers and clarity you’re looking for. And maybe you’re wondering if you’ll ever be able to achieve trust in your relationship again.
A therapist can be a vital resource in navigating life after infidelity. In the open, nonjudgmental space of counseling, you can begin to process the affair, develop a new understanding of yourselves and the relationship, and take meaningful steps toward healing and recovery.
Have any questions? Send us a message.
Many Factors Contribute To Infidelity, But Recovery Is Possible
We’ve worked with a lot of couples in therapy who are grappling with feelings of shame, guilt, and betrayal following an affair—we know how complicated and sensitive the relationship dynamic can become once infidelity enters the picture.
As the betrayed partner, you’re probably feeling blindsided by a sudden and very painful rupture in your relationship. You may be distressed, overwhelmed, and losing sleep, left alone to wonder why this happened and if you’re to blame. You never imagined yourself as being someone who would stay in a relationship following an affair, but now that you’re here, you don’t even know what to think. As a result, you’re having a hard time trusting your partner—and yourself, for that matter—and you might feel too embarrassed or ashamed to talk openly about what happened.
As the partner who committed the betrayal, we know you’re struggling too. You may have gotten caught up in a fantasy or found something elsewhere that you felt like you weren’t getting at home. You’re probably questioning yourself and what it means about you—and the future of your relationship—that you did something to hurt your partner. Confusion and shame may have clouded your ability to concentrate, think clearly, and express yourself.
A therapist’s job is to affirm and understand both of your experiences as you develop tools for processing infidelity together. As you learn how to communicate, identify your needs, and figure out how to repair the dynamic in a healthy way, we can help you determine what the future holds for your relationship.
We Specialize In Therapy For Couples Navigating Infidelity
At Family Perspectives, LLC, we offer couples solution-focused, practical approaches for promoting both long- and short-term recovery following an affair. With the understanding that your relationship is in crisis, our goal is to make the counseling experience feel focused, productive, and skill-oriented as you build a coping toolkit for navigating infidelity both in and out of the therapy space.
This process is highly customized to each couple’s unique needs and experience. We’re likely to incorporate solution-focused, cognitive-behavioral interventions that offer strategies for reducing distress and overwhelm. Using relational therapies like Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), the Gottman Method, and family systems, we’ll work to help both of you foster a new understanding of each other’s values and needs. As each partner learns to take ownership of their emotions and role in the relationship, you can begin to determine how to move forward.
A Therapist Can Help You View Your Situation With Less Shame And Judgment
In addition to effective, evidence-based interventions, the therapist-client relationship itself will be a highly valuable tool in counseling for affair recovery. Because our infidelity specialists take great measures to ensure that the therapy space is collaborative and nonjudgmental, we are able to effectively model authenticity and empathy to the couples we work with, which can be transformational for recovery. We want both of you to feel safe and comfortable opening up about your experiences so that you can meaningfully process your own and each other’s emotions.
While it’s normal for infidelity to send relationships into a tailspin, therapy can give you tools for healing the rupture that’s occurred between you. It is possible to have the kind of open, trusting, and fulfilling relationship you’ve always wanted—and you may even find that your emotional connection is stronger than ever through the process of affair recovery.
Common Questions About Infidelity Therapy…
I feel so ashamed about the infidelity, and I don’t feel comfortable opening up about it in counseling with a therapist.
We know from lots of experience working with couples in affair recovery that shame is not a helpful motivator. While it’s painful and often embarrassing being on either side of an affair, there are many factors in every unique relationship obstacle that are worth exploring in therapy.
Our therapists are trained professionals who’ve guided lots of couples in the process of navigating infidelity. We know that counseling is not about judgment; it’s about understanding.
I am not ready to face what an affair says about the state of our relationship.
Therapy is an intimidating prospect for a lot of couples, especially when emotions are high after infidelity has occurred. But you are never alone in this process; a trained therapist will be here to guide you both every step of the way.
Understanding and processing what happened is an essential part of the healing journey, and if you don’t, challenges are likely to continue. The sooner you and your partner fully address the infidelity together, the sooner you can gain clarity and avoid having conflict snowball out of control.
A therapist will take sides or push for a specific outcome in our relationship.
Therapists don’t take sides in counseling, and we are trained to make sure that each partner feels heard and validated in the therapy space. In couples counseling following an infidelity, we aim to treat the relationship as a whole—and not just the people in it.
That said, we do not have an agenda for the couples we work with in therapy for affair recovery. While our goal is to get you to a place of healing, repair, and open, honest communication, we understand that not all relationships have the same outcome. No matter what you and your partner decide through the process of counseling, we want to help you come to a decision in a way that promotes peace and decreases conflict. In some cases, couples finish this process feeling stronger than ever in their relationship.
Healing Starts Today
If infidelity has caused conflict, stress, and uncertainty in your relationship, affair recovery therapy through Family Perspectives, LLC can help you overcome shame and collaborate with decisions that align with your values both as individuals and as a couple. Schedule your first appointment to get started with a therapist who specializes in infidelity.